THE BIG 'C'

Let's talk about the Big 'C' - Communication.

Communication defined:

• the act or process of using words, sounds, signs, or behaviors to express or exchange information or to express your ideas, thoughts, feelings, etc., to someone else

Periods of silence in a marriage lead to isolation, separation and delayed purpose. One of the highest levels of human interaction is marriage. The scripture says, "Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 18:19). 
Notice God did not just say touching would do it. It takes more than just physical contact and sexual intimacy to have good success in a marriage, you must communicate. Agreement takes communication. You can't agree with somebody unless they effectively communicate with you the thing that they want you to agree with them. Husbands and wives must come into agreement if they are to walk (live) together. The prophet Amos posed the question, "Can two walk together, except they be agreed." Amos 3:3

Agreement defined:

• the absence of incompatibility between two things; consistency.
• Synonyms: correspondence, consistency, compatibility, accord.

Could it be that the reason you think you are no longer compatible with your spouse is because you don't communicate any more and/or never learned to communicate with one another from the beginning. You speak words to each other but those words are not effectively communicating what's really on your heart and mind. You have adapted your life-style to just mere talking to be cordial however it is evident the two of you are not walking together because there's no true agreement. When communication ceases things began to decrease and eventually decease.

God's will is that you have a viable, meaningful relationship and union with your spouse however His ways of doing things are not like human ways. If we want good godly success in our marriage we must be willing to do things God's way.

The bible says,

"man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God." Matthew 4:4

God is saying to us here that it takes more than natural resources to sustain life. You and I must be willing to be imitators of God and copy His examples. God was saying if you are going to have a fruitful and/or successful relationship with me there has to be communication. If God doesn't speak (communicate) nothing in our lives could live or flourish. This then holds true for all unions or relationships. 

God's will for your marriage is that you and your spouse would grow in your love and honor for one another by cultivating and nurturing effective communication in all good things.

My prayer for you today is that you and your spouse would begin to practice effect communication, God's way -  today!

Philemon 1:6

That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus

We will talk more on this subject in future blogs.

The Marriage Manual  blog is an extension of Harris Ministries International. Visit our other websites: www.harrisministriesint.com, www.detoxifyingthesoul.com, www.fellasofgod.com, www.beyondyourweight.com,  www.nurturingnuggets.net

Love Believes the Best

Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].      1 Corinthians 13:7 (AMP)           

God loves you so very much and He reveals that love through the person of His Son, Jesus Christ. It is His will that you know and understand and/or comprehend His love for you. However, it doesn’t just end there, God desires for you and I to experience His love towards us every day in every way. When we experience God’s love first hand it takes us to an entirely different level of trust and obedience.

Now hold on, I know you are ecstatic about that but that’s not all, God not only wants you to be a recipient of His love but an instrument of His love as well. An instrument is a tool used for service of the one authorized to use it or whomever (s)he lends it to.

It is God’s intent that you would be an instrument of His love allowing it to manifest in you and through you.

 In this the love of God was made manifest (displayed) where we are concerned: in that God sent His Son, the only begotten or unique [Son], into the world so that we might live through Him. 1 John 4:9

Manifest defined:

·        Readily perceived by the senses and especially by the sense of sight. (Merriam-Webster online)

A marriage union is a perfect environment and/or ideal setting for love to manifest. You spouse not only needs to know and understand you love them, they also need to experience the manifestation of that love. It’s one thing to know something but an entirely different thing to experience what you know.

In our scripture reading for today’s blog, 1Corinthians 13:7 speaks of love being manifest through us in that it is always ready (prepared) to believe (active faith – faith without works is dead – James 2:18) the best of every person. This lets us know that true love is not self-seeking but always finds a way to promote good will and peace. Just think of how many arguments and/or marital tensions could be averted through practicing this element of love. Refusing to focus on your spouse’s weakness and/or imperfections is a manifestation of the love of God through you towards them. They perceive and recognize your restrain in a time when you could have reacted negatively to their undesirable behavior. They see you consistently being an instrument in the hands of love as it uses you to be a scalpel to cut away or a bandage to cover unsightly areas in their lives.

To believe in something generally means that you are living by faith and not being persuaded by what you see. Believing the best in your spouse may mean that you see their weakness, uncontrolled temper, selfish attitude etc. every day but yet you choose to believe and act on what God thinks about them. You choose to believe and confess that they are the apple of God’s eye when you see them doing and acting against the plans and purposes that God has for their lives.  God’s love for your spouse is unconditional and is based upon His goodness and faithfulness not theirs.

Sometimes in our marriage relationships we can get so caught up and focusing on the love our spouse has neglected to give or express to us that we forget that’s not our sole reason for being in a marriage union. Remember God loved us when we were unlovable. He loved us before we ever responded favorably to His love. If you think about it God loves people who actually never loved Him back. Some people go to their graves and refuse to love God however that never stopped Him from loving them. His thoughts toward them are of peace and not of evil.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” Jeremiah 29:11

I challenge you today to practice giving love despite the love you have or have not received in return.  Be determined to be a vessel or instrument ready for God to use daily. Choose to think like God and cultivate thoughts that believe the best of your spouse and  not thoughts of revenge, retaliation, suspicious, unforgiveness, pass hurts, betrayals, disappointments and failures but thoughts of peace and not evil.

Love truly believes the best.

My prayer for you and your spouse today is that you would believe the best of them and actively participate in daily opportunities to nurture and cultivate true love.

The Marriage Manual is an extension of Harris Ministries International, visit our websites.

www.harrisministriesint.com, www.detoxifyingthesoul.com, www.beyondyourweight.com, www.fellasofgod.com, www.nurturingnuggets.net